


I won't give up

by UhmLikeWhet



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Retirement Home AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-12
Updated: 2015-08-12
Packaged: 2018-04-14 09:28:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4559439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UhmLikeWhet/pseuds/UhmLikeWhet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>inspired by the song Tyler Wards cover of I wont give up by Jason Mraz. It's encouraged to listen to the song while listening :) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tsq76l-wkIY</p>
    </blockquote>





	I won't give up

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by the song Tyler Wards cover of I wont give up by Jason Mraz. It's encouraged to listen to the song while listening :) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tsq76l-wkIY

Carmilla takes a deep breath and clears her throat as she walks through the pale beige door with a bouquet of lovely flowers in her left hand.

She walks to the reception desk and signs her name in the visitation book.

"It's good to see you Carmilla." The receptionist says with a smile.

Carmilla smiles back and nods.

"She's been asking for you all morning."

Carmilla's smile starts to fade as she listens to the words. She knows all too well those words mean bad things.

"Not me, specifically." Carmilla corrects.

The womans smile fades as she clears her throat and holds up a stamp pad.

"At least she knows what today is..." The woman trails off.

Carmilla sighs and holds out her hand to be stamped with the visitors ink.

"Those are some lovely flowers you have there." The girl says.

"Thanks." Carmilla smiles, waiting to be buzzed in.

She hears the buzzer and nods to the girl once again before walking down the baby blue hallways she knows all too well.

She nods to the familiar faces in wheelchairs and the nice attendants to those people. 

This place looks happy, but feels miserable.

She picks up her pace a little bit, not looking around anymore. Instead, she keeps her eyes trained to the slightly dirty, white tiles on the floor. She just want's to make it to her destination and spend some time there.

A nice looking man walks out of her room holding an empty cup. She must have just taken her medication. 

The man sighs when he see's her.

Carmilla freezes, preparing to turn around and get the hell out of there, but then he starts to approach her and she drops the flowers to her side.

"Carmilla, hi." The man says, obviously putting on a fake smile.

"Hey." She answers, hesitantly. 

The man sighs again, placing his fingertips together to form a triangle. "She's not having such a good day.

Carmilla all but deflates. "She was having a 'bad day' last week too." She looks to the floor and kicks her feet. "And the week before that." She whispers to herself.

"Well, she's getting older Carmilla. That's expected for someone her age."

Carmilla knows he's right. She is getting old. Age 93 to be exact. It's going to make saying goodbye today even harder.

She huffs in defeat. "Look, can I see her or not?" She asks, pointing the flowers to her door.

The man moves out of her way and points his hand as an invitation.

"Asshole." She mumbles under her breath.

Once she's approached the beige door, she looks though the window connecting her room to the hall way.

"There's my girl." Carmilla whispers in a smile. She stands for a second, watching Laura look out the window in her beige and white clothing and white tennis shoes.

She closes her eyes and quickly fixes her outfit, which is already put together nicely. 

When she comes to visit she dresses nice. Today she's in light grey skinny jeans and a white V-neck T shirt with red converse. Okay so maybe it's not what you would call "nice" but it's cleaned up from her usual all black attire. 

She smooths out her shirt and takes a deep breath before opening her eyes and walking through the door.

Laura doesn't move. She's still fixated with whatever she's looking at to notice the company walk through the door.

"Laura?" Carmilla says, sweetly.

Laura turns slowly, smiling immediately.

"Oh." She starts. "You look like someone I used to know." Laura says, standing up from her wheel chair.

Carmilla can see her struggling so she walks over to help her. "Yeah, I-uh.. I get that a lot." Carmilla stutters.

It's hard to visit Laura. She's gotten worse over the years. She doesn't remember much and she doesn't know who Carmilla is, but she know's that she's familiar.

"Oh I bet you do. You're very pretty." Laura huffs out a laugh.

Carmilla smiles a watery smile. It pains her to see her like this.

After she's helped her up, Carmilla backs away and shrugs the flowers, handing them over to Laura.

Laura smiles, taking them in her wrinkly hands and smelling them. "These smell just darling." She hobbles over to her bedside and puts them next to the dozens of dead flowers Carmilla has brought her.

"Yeah um, somebody told me you liked them." Carmilla clears her throat, standing awkwardly in the middle of the room as she watches her decaying lovers past struggle to put the flowers in the brown water.

Laura walks back over to Carmilla and lifts her left hand to kiss her knuckles. "It's a pleasure to meet you, young lady. What's your name?"

Carmilla breath catches in her throat. "Um, Mircalla." She nods, with a smile.

"That's a very pretty name, Mircalla." Laura looks down at her hand and smiles a the gold ring laying on Carmilla's left ring finger.

"Oh, are you married?" Laura takes her hand in both of her shaking wrinkled hands. 

"Um yeah." She nods again, trying to swallow the tears.

She's promised herself multiple times that she would stop coming to visit. It hurts too much. Laura wouldn't know the difference of her presents being here or not.

"Must be a lucky lad." Laura smiles, tapping her hand.

"Yeah, he is." Carmilla chuckles, uneasy.

She takes her hand back and clears her throat.

"Have we met before Mircalla?"

Carmilla's eyes bug a little bit.

"Uh.."

"I know I've seen you somewhere before."

"I don't know. Have we?"

There silence as Laura looks around, thinking hard.

"Are you my nurse?" She concludes, looking very confused.

"No. I'm-I'm not your nurse." Carmilla deflates as she sniffs her tears away.

"Oh." She nods. "You know, I was married once too." Laura walks over to her bed and lowers herself down slowly.

"You were?" Carmilla asks, almost hopeful.

"Yes, I was." Laura pats the bed side next to her for Carmilla to sit. "In fact, today is our anniversary. She should be here any minute." She smiles.

She walks over slowly, trying not to stutter or choke over her words as she changes the subject a bit. "Can you tell me about her?" She asks, once she's seated.

"She was beautiful. Stunningly beautiful." Laura whispers, grabbing both of Carmilla's hands once more. "Oh, you should have seen her!"

Carmilla smiles, watching her wife ramble on about her younger self.

"She had a bit of an attitude and she was harsh on the outside but oh, was she ever the sweetest things to me... Uh, sweetheart, what's your name again?"

"Ca-Mircalla." She corrects.

"Right, right. My memory isn't what it use to be honey." Laura laughs at her joke. Carmilla smiles down to her lap. "Anyways, Mircalla, I think you two would have gotten along just nicely." 

Carmilla huffs and smiles, wiping an escaped tear from her cheek before Laura can notice.

 _Stay strong._ She warns herself.

"What's her name?" She asks, mistakenly. The nurses tell her not to stress her out with too many questions. Her memory has gotten worse and it makes her frustrated to think too hard. But Carmilla hasn't gotten this far with Laura in a long time. At least she remembers she was married, and to a girl at that.

"I-I don't know." Laura looks away defeated. She detaches herself from Carmilla and wipes her hands on her tan capris, eye brows in a frown.

Carmilla looks away and squints her eyes shut tight.

Laura looks over at Carmilla. "My dear, why are you crying?"

Carmilla stills, wiping her eyes furiously.

 _God damn it. I did NOT want her seeing me like this._ She thinks.

"I-I think it's allergies." Carmilla stands up quickly.

"Oh- Can i get you anything? The nurses can get you-"

"No-no it's okay, I'm just going to-" Carmilla is pointing to the door when she gets interrupted.

"Hey, I know you from somewhere.." Laura proceeds to stand up.

Carmilla's face bunches and she starts to cry hard, leaving the room, without so much as a goodbye.

A few nurses look at her with hurt. This isn't the first time she's left crying. But it _will_ be the last. She knew it was a bad idea to come today. She should have stopped coming a long time ago, but today was their anniversary and she wanted to see her. She's walking quickly down the hallway when she hears it. It's almost missed, it's such a whisper.

"Carmilla? Wait."

As she's walking away, she stops and lifts her head from looking at the floor.

She turns to see a confused Laura poking a bit out of her room. 

The nurses gasp. The attendance's in the hallway stop wheeling their patients. Everything stops for a second. And then there's just Carmilla and her thoughts.

_How could I just leave her like this? Leave her forgetful and lonely. She has nobody but me. I may still look like a kid to her but.. She knows me. She makes it clear. She remembers a past lover. She knows she's married. I mean, she hasn't thrown away the dead flowers or changed the brown water. I can do this. I can start coming everyday again instead of once a week. I can bring her back._

"Hey, cupcake." Carmilla wipes her eyes as she smiles.

 _I won't give up._ She thinks.

**Author's Note:**

> Bonus: I do not own this.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dA3MKnxsXOU


End file.
